Me: hello is anyone there

Silence:

Silence:

Silence:

Silence:

Silence:

Silence:

Silence:

Murderer: lmfao u caught me I'll be out in a sec lmao

toxicwinner:

how many times have i seen the prettiest girls w the ugliest guys and I’m staring at him wondering if it’s the way the light is hitting his face or smth and she’s looking at me like stay away from my man…listen im just trying to solve a puzzle you beautiful idiot

I’m so loyal to anything that gives me the teeniest bit of happiness and completion, and that’s exactly where my naivety lies.

Dau Voire (via kushandwizdom)

eenjolras:

when you accidentally start watching a crime show and can’t get yourself to switch the channel because now you wanna know who fucking did it

nokiabae:

my biggest fear is I’m married & my husband says, “let’s cut sugar out of our diet” so I have to leave with the kids in the middle of the night